The happiness of the good deed.

I was walking with a friend when we spotted a set of keys right in the middle of the huge, hectic intersection at 86th and Lexington.

I scooped them up, but when we got to the sidewalk, we were at a loss. Given that the keys were in the middle of the street, the owner had probably just dropped them. What to do? Give them to the guy in the corner newsstand? Put them on the sidewalk and hope the owner would re-trace her steps? (The key chain was a preppy band of pink and blue ribbon; it obviously belonged to a woman.)

Even a few months ago, I don’t think I would have spent much time trying to figure out a solution, but one of my May goals is “Look for ways to help others.” Also, I must confess, my friend was very determined to solve the problem.

There was no conspicuous place to leave the keys to be found, so we looked back at the key-ring. It was strange; I felt guilty, like we were looking through her wallet.

What clues? A label from the store CK Bradley on the ribbon key-chain. An AAA key-chain card. And, ah-ha, a mini-membership card for Kidville, a place that offers little kids’ classes, with a bar code identifier stamped on one side. Kidville would be able to access the owner’s account and get her phone number. And Kidville was only two blocks away, at 84th.

I offered to drop off the keys; selfishly, I wanted the buzz of doing the good deed. The Kidville clerk promised to call the owner on her cell phone, and I left feeling great. Imagine the owner's relief! Maybe she hadn’t even noticed that her keys were missing.

Studies show that people who perform acts of kindness get a measurable boost in happiness. In fact, Jonathan Haidt points out in his terrific book, The Happiness Hypothesis, people are often made happier by giving help than by getting it.

Do good, feel good.

Comments

[Warren]

I really relate to your efforts to return the lost keys, and I enjoy nothing more than being a good scout, good "Samaritan."

Over the years, I have retrieved and returned many lost pets, helped lost children, picked up litter, given directions to innumerable strangers,returned wallets and keys, helped with baggage,returned mis-delivered mail, called people who mistakenly left voicemails on my recorder (so they would know they had it wrong), picked up many nails and screws in streets and parking lots, pushed stalled cars,and I always return my shopping cart--sometimes along with others--to the proper place. These things are usually done in the midst of leading everyday life--and it feels great.

Three times in the last 10 years, I have found cash--with no one in sight--and no plausible way to find the owner--the sums were $10, 20, and then over 200 in a wad. I like to believe that these findings have been some sort of gift for my everyday good deeds over the years. But, you know, finding the cash makes me smile--but doing all the other things makes me happy!

[jasmine]

would you post about spending out? what does that mean?

[Schizohedron]

Good on ya for helping to get those keys back to their rightful owner. I had a recent brush with a misplaced object — a handbag left near some produce at Whole Foods — that also had a happy ending: (http://schizohedron.blogspot.com/2006/04/good-deed-for-day.html)

Keep up the good deeds and thanks for your fine blog!

[Joe]

I know exactly what you're talking about - I was at the Burlington VT marathon this weekend (my wife ran) and an friend and I sat by the side of the course in a couple of quiet places while the "casual" runners went by, cheering for every one of them. 99% of them smiled when we cheered - especially when we used their names (The smart ones had written their names on their shirts to draw out just this sort of encouragement). Most of them seemed to lift a little - some a lot, and quite a few smiled and waved back, or even called out "thanks!"

It felt really great to help them out just a little. And, when my wife reached the 17 mile mark where we were, we rant he rest of the marathon with her, helping her keep up her pace an spirits. it felt really good to help her.

Joe

[KL]

The reason why it makes one happy to perform good deeds, is because you are actively creating the world you wish you lived in. If you are constantly finding ways to show kindness, then you are SURE that the world is kind... If you do not perform acts like these, it is often easy to lose faith in the world and see it as a dark place, and consequently only "attract" negative things because of the mindset you're in.

Doing good deeds is a creative and effective way of restoring your faith in other people. It also works in a Pay It Forward sort of way -- anybody who has the good fortune of being helped out randomly by a stranger, is often so grateful & surprised that they go on to look for opportunities to do the same for someone else.

[James]

Please remove my post and URL - thanks.

James