An extreme sport you can do in your own home: Extreme Nice.

Today is our wedding anniversary. Although the Big Man and I don’t exchange gifts, in honor of the occasion, I decided to give him a secret treat: a week of Extreme Nice.

My last week of Extreme Nice was back in February, as part of the month of “Sing in the morning,” which focused on marriage and parenthood. I didn’t tell the Big Man he was getting the Extreme-Nice treatment, and I don’t think he realized it—except probably to be pleasantly surprised or relieved at several points.

What is “Extreme Nice”? It’s an extreme sport like bungee jumping or skydiving—pushing the envelope, exerting myself beyond my ordinary efforts, finding new depths in myself to meet the hardest challenges. And I can do it in my own home.

So this week I intend to be utterly nice to the Big Man. No criticism. No pestering. No bickering. Jumping up to do whatever he asks me to do, responding enthusiastically to his every suggestion.

Extreme Nice was a great exercise when I did it in February. It’s not sustainable for the long term, but by doing it for one week, I reminded myself of a different standard of behavior. I want to maintain very high expectations for myself—it’s not right that I should take more care with my friends or my parents than with the Big Man, love of my life.

We wouldn't be able to live together forever without a disagreement, but I should be able to go more than a week without nagging.

So here goes: Day One of Extreme Nice.
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If you're looking for suggestions on how to be a better (or at least a more efficient) parent, a great source for a lot of practical yet good-humored advice is Parent Hacks.

Comments

[Tony Mulqueen]

We're on the program :) will report back ...

[Monica Ricci]

Gretchen, Congrats and Happy Anniversary! My man and I also celebrated twice this week. September 1 was ten years together as a couple and August 31 was four years married. We have no kids, so it is admittedly a bit easier for us to practice Extreme Nice more often than not. (And if not Extreme, at least Above Average Nice.) ;)

I figure the very least you can do is make an effort to be nice to the person you're spending your life with. Also, being kind, respectful, patient, courteous, (and all the other ways we treat complete strangers) should be the order of every day at home because what you give you get more of in return. :)

To Niceness,
~Monica

[Jennifer Yates]

I think your blog is just chock-full of rather great links! And from your picture, it looks like we would have a lot in common. It is easy to be heavy and hard to be light--but not too hard. Especially when you've been heavy a long time. But I do get angry alot. I have decided to do a week of Extreme Nice, starting when I wake up tomorrow--to my Big Man--I haven't always thought he was the one for me, and then felt a little unfaithful when I would think of ditching him and finding someone else, although it's not that easy to do, but I can at least be super nice to him while he is in my life, because after all, aren't those Jesus' words? If you love those who love you, what reward do you have? However, pray for those who spitefully use you and bless those who curse you. --Jennifer P.S. Thanks for listening.