Marking my calendar for happiness.

A phrase I first noticed in the journal of Charles Dodgson -- better known as Lewis Carroll -- has stuck in my mind. He wrote, “I mark this day most specially with a white stone.”

A bit of research revealed that “days marked with a white stone” are days of pleasure, or days to be remembered with special gratification. The phrase comes from the Romans, who used a white stone to mark lucky days on their calendar.

I love this idea of marking a special day. Perhaps this is a way to use my newly adopted blue-bird-of-happiness motif.

Certainly the day I returned from my trip was a day to mark with a blue bird. It was nice to be away, but it was bliss to be back—to cuddle my two girls on my lap and to wake up next to the Big Man in the morning.

The reunion with the Big Girl and the Little Girl was bittersweet, though, because we’re leaving again in a few days for India, for a wedding. It will be exciting and wonderful, but I’d feel a lot better about leaving if I hadn’t just been away.

It’s not that I’m worried about the girls—I know they’ll be fine—but I feel sad about being away for so long. I don’t like the thought of missing so much, especially with the Little Girl, who, at nineteen months, is changing so quickly that I know she’ll be in an entirely new stage by the time we return.

But instead of dwelling on the downside, I’m trying to focus my attention on how lucky I am to be able to go on this trip, and to see a real Indian wedding, and to have a holiday alone with the Big Man.

Also, although it’s a long trip, and a lot of logistics, I know that no matter what happens, no matter how many flight delays or traffic jams we suffer, I’ll be able to comfort myself by thinking—at least I’m not traveling with two small children.

In the meantime, I'm trying to appreciate the pleasure of being with the Big Girl and the Little Girl -- a pleasure it's so easy to take for granted, until I know I'm going to be away from home. And I can look forward to the next day to mark with a blue bird: the day we come back.

Comments

[Liz Craft]

Gretchen, this reminds me of a fond memory from our own childhood. When I was a very little girl--maybe four or five--our parents went to Asia for several weeks, leaving us with our grandparents in Nebraska. We had--I'm sure--a wonderful time being spoiled by our grandparents. But what I really remember was the pure joy of Mom and Dad returning to get us. They'd brought all sorts of treasures from their exotic travels and seeing them again was pure bliss. I'd probably have no memory of that time if we'd been living our day to day lives in Kansas City. But I know I'll never forget that reunion.

[Laura Gibbs]

hello, I am a regular reader of your wonderful blog! (I have especially enjoyed your book recommendations).

I noticed your post today about the white stone - it's probably not so much that the Romans actually did this, but they believed that the Thracians did this, it was kind of like an urban legend of ancient times.

anyway, I've got some information about that if you are interested in a blog post about Latin proverbs, one of those proverbs being the one you found in Dodgson's diary. The part about the use of the white stones is down below the Latin proverbs, including a lovely passage from Philemon Holland's Renaissance English translation of the Roman author Pliny who first reports the practice:

Roman proverbs about stones
http://tinyurl.com/fqazq

(I tinyurl-ified the blog address; it looked like I couldn't include actual html here in the post)

Best wishes on your blog - it's one of my favorites!