Why going on vacation can make me unhappy – if I let it.

We just started our family vacation. Everything is delightful, we’re in a place we love, with friends nearby, lots of time to goof around.

And yet I’m anxious and agitated. I yelled at the Big Man. I stomped around.

Why? Because of limited internet and cell phone access.

Seneca wrote, “Prosperity fosters bad tempers” – and it’s really true. The “hedonic treadmill” describes our ability to adapt quickly to changed circumstances. We get accustomed to air-conditioning, color TV, penicillin, the ubiquity of Diet Coke, and internet access, and take these luxuries for granted. Take the luxuries away, however, and the bad temper sets in.

Also, there’s something particularly unnerving about not having constant email, internet, and phone access. It doesn’t feel merely inconvenient, it feels almost…scary. I feel cut off. But why this matters, I don’t know. If anything, I should be pleased to have the distractions shut off.

I refuse to let this issue put a cloud over our vacation. I’m setting aside one time each day when I’ll try to post to this blog and check my email. At that time, I’ll fuss about it. Other than that, I’m going to put it out of my mind.

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I was very pleased to be asked to join LifeRemix, a new network of blogs selected for being great writing about how to live a better life. I was already familiar with most of the blogs included, plus discovered some new ones. One of the things I enjoy most about blogging is getting a chance to connect with other bloggers, and it’s a lot of fun to be part of this group endeavor. (Turns out one of the founders lives in Lawrence, Kansas, so we have the whole Missouri/Kansas connection. It always surprises me what a kick I get from even an attenuated hometown connection.)

LifeRemix is launching today, so check it out.

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Comments

[Kaja]

The conventional wisdom seems to be that tech "overconnectedness" keeps us from harnessing inner resources that we have no choice but to develop in a less stimulating environment.
That may be true, but I like the perspective of Kate Fox, a social anthropologist at Oxford who argues that there are very sound reasons we're all so addicted to wireless communication, namely, staying in non-stop contact with the people we care about *counteracts* the anomie of contemporary life.

[Marsh]

I recently traveled through Asia for six weeks. If I could check my email every 36 hours or so I felt I could really enjoy the trip more. When the time stretched past 48 hours, I grew agitated. I'm trying to find out if this is good or bad. My beloved middle-aged dog grew ill and died while I was gone. I know my family would have made the same decisions without my input, but I was really happy I was a part of it. I travel a lot. I don't want to be addicted to the Internet, but is it wrong to want to feel connected to the people I love? How do you find the balance? I'm planning a trip for October now. How much do I insist on finding a hotel near an Internet cafe, or that has Internet access in the hotel? How do I know if my Internet relationship is making me happy or unhappy in the end?