This Wednesday: Twelve tips for keeping your resolutions after the zeal of 1/1/08 has worn off.

Every Wednesday is Tip Day.
This Wednesday: Twelve tips for sticking to your resolutions after the zeal of 1/1/08 has worn off.

Some 44% of Americans make New Year’s resolutions. I loooooove resolutions and make them constantly – I’m a big believer in the power of small changes to make us happier.

But it can be hard to stick to a resolution. Here are twelve tips for following through on a resolution as the year progresses:

1. Write it down – and be specific. Don’t try to “make more friends”; instead, “start a movie group,” “remember birthdays,” “say hello,” “make plans.”

2. Review your resolution constantly. If your resolution is buzzing through your head, it’s easier to stick to it.

3. Hold yourself accountable. Tell other people about your resolution, join or form a like-minded group, score yourself on a chart -- whatever works for you to make yourself feel accountable for success and failure.

4. Think big. Maybe you need a big change, a big adventure – a trip to a foreign place, a break-up, a move, a new job. Let yourself imagine anything, and plan from there.

5. Think small. Don’t fall into the trap of thinking that only radical change can make a difference. Just keeping your fridge cleared out could give you a real boost. Look close to home for ways to improve and grow.

6. Break your main resolution into smaller, more manageable tasks. Also, a long to-do list will give you a feeling of progress as you work toward a distant goal.

7. Keep your resolution every day. Weirdly, it’s often easier to do something every day (exercise, post to a blog, deal with the mail) than every few days.

8. Set a deadline.

9. Don’t give up if something interferes with your deadline.

10. Ask for help. Why is this so hard? But every time I ask for help, I’m amazed at how much easier my task becomes.

11. Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good. Thank you, Voltaire. Instead of starting your new exercise routine by training for the marathon, aim for a 20-minute walk each day. Instead of cleaning out the whole basement, tackle one closet this afternoon. If you break your resolution today, try again tomorrow.

Benjamin Franklin and Samuel Johnson are the two patron saints of those who make resolutions. Benjamin Franklin’s virtue charts inspired me to do my own resolution charts (if you'd like to see my charts, drop me an email at grubin [that add the “at” symbol] gretchenrubin [add the “dotcom” part]).

I laugh every time I read the entry from Samuel Johnson’s diary on his 51st birthday in September 1760. He has a long list of resolutions, and he concludes with four resolutions to begin at once:

Rise as early as I can.
Send for books for Hist. of war.
Put books in order.
Scheme life.

“Scheme life!” Now that’s a resolution.

His first resolution, “Rise as early as I can,” brings me to Tip #12: Consider giving up a resolution.

For his whole life, Johnson vowed to start getting up early, and he remained a late riser. But he managed to get quite a bit accomplished, anyway. So give it up, Dr. Johnson! Sleep late, and enjoy it!

If you keep making and breaking a resolution, consider whether you should relinquish it entirely. Put your energy toward changes that are both realistic and helpful. Don't let an unfulfilled resolution to lose twenty pounds or to overhaul your overgrown yard block you from making other, smaller resolutions that might give you a big happiness boost.

And if one of your resolutions is to drink more water, don't worry about it! This is a myth! You do NOT need to drink more water!

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I often stop by Marginal Revolution, and with this visit, was rewarded with a post about the relationship between money and happiness -- one of the most complicated and misunderstood sub-topics within the subject of happiness.

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Comments

[Desci]

Hi,

Love your blog and I think what you're doing is incredibly helpful! So thank you.

I'd just say, on the water issue, perhaps not to take it on face value - this is one Professor, and even the article is largely speculative. I drink 2 litres of water a day and since I started this last year, have felt the benefits in several aspects of my health (I won't go into graphic detail!)

Many nutrition experts, health workers and professors still swear by drinking at least two litres per day. One professor saying his studies don't necessarily show that water is beneficial, isn't enough to conclude that therefore it's not important. And for the trivial 'other' drawbacks he adds (going to the bathroom frequently being one of them) there are so, so many benefits (one equally s trivial one being that if you're drinking water, then you're not drinking other MUCH worse drinks like coke!)

Anyway, besides that wee little quibble, keep up the good work!

[Stacibo]

Thank you for the constant inspiration. My intention for 2008 is commitment. Like cultivating happiness, commitment addresses the root from my perspective. Be well!

[Rochael Teynor]

Happy New Year Gretchen! You have been a wonderful source of not only inspiration, but good ol' common sense, too! I've embarked upon my own Happiness Project in 2008 - thanks to you! I've linked to you on my blog and hope to send many more to your site. Best Wishes to you and your family!

[Hyderabad]

Good suggestions. But I feel a person needs a lot of inner strenght to keep up with his new year resolutions.

[mother in israel]

Aren't you missing one?

[Heather at Grace303]

I like the suggestions to think big and small. Both are important for different reasons. I also like the pointer to break things down into small tasks and be specific. This always helps me accomplish more.

[Gretchen Rubin]

Hi -- Tip #12 is at the end, to give up resolutions that aren't working.

Well, I don't know that drinking all that water is costless. First of all, if you buy bottled water, it's expensive, a pain, and not good for the environment. Also, apparently doctors have seen a rise in incontinence problems among people whose bodies just can't handle that amount of water!

Everyone repeats the importance of drinking water, but look for EVIDENCE for WHY to bother. I couldn't find any.

Of course, if it makes you feel great to drink water, keep doing it. It just bothers me to keep seeing that so many people feel anxious about their inability to drink that much water, when as far as I can tell, it doesn't really matter. We only have so much energy to spend on our resolutions (as another poster pointed out) so priorities count. The evidence of the benefits of walking for twenty minutes a day are HUGE, by contrast.

Good luck to everyone with their resolutions!

[mother in israel]

Nursing mothers are often advised to ingest huge quantities of water, but too much can actually interfere with lactation. Nursing mothers should drink to thirst.

I see it now!

[Never the Same River Twice]

I really like #12. To me, it's vital to remain flexible in our goals and resolutions, otherwise they become self-flagellation rather than helpful. We need to be able to respond to changes in our internal and external environments to plan our futures effectively. I wrote a little about this process here:
http://www.blog.neverthesamerivertwice.com/2008/01/02/having-goals-will-make-you-blind/

[sean]

could I give a cure for ugliness? Look at the other people on the tube

[Keely H.]

In my post on keeping your New Year's resolution to exercise I also included "don't let the perfect be the enemy of the good", but I worded it as aiming for "progress, rather than perfection".

Great post! I like that you were brave enough to include "think big" and "think small" back to back. They should contradict each other but because people are individuals with different needs they complement each other nicely.

[matsonian]

My favorite book on happiness... the Way to Happiness. And for developing plans and sticking with it... try developing a Strategic Life Plan with QuickPlanner Plus.

[Susan]

Drinking water can be beneficial, but more is not always necessary or beneficial.

I started drinking water to the point of getting hunger and thirst signals confused, My friends were making fun of my constant thirst, and I was starting to feel weird, too, so I made a doctor's appointment. The doctor was a little bit dismissive at first, saying that the recommended amount (64oz) can seem like a lot if you aren't used to it, but she listened when I told her I was drinking over twice that amount.

I didn't keep my follow-up appointment to get bloodwork done (because I was too embarrassed), but I think I had messed up my electrolytes with the combination of drinking too much water and exercising without eating enough (as I said, I had confused my hunger and thirst signals).

I didn't think the water drinking was compulsive because I actually felt thirsty, but when a friend suggested it as a possibility I reduced my water intake and found that the thirst quickly went away (or became normal). I never thought that I could be compulsive about drinking water, but apparently it's possible!

This year, my resolution is to strive for balance in all areas of my life. It's harder than it seems, or at least it is for me!

[grimo1re]

Hi Gretchen, I was wondering if you have your resolution charts on actual paper or on the computer? And where do you remind yourself? What do you when you have visitors - do you rip off the sticky notes in the bathroom or not? Just wondering...:)