Do you have a pet peeve – something that you always complain about?

Most of us have a few pet peeves. My mother-in-law can’t stand to listen to people talk on their cell phones. The Big Man doesn’t like seeing dirty dishes on the kitchen counter.

Don’t get me started on airport security or email spam. Or TVs in restaurants.

One of my resolutions has been to stop myself from talking about my pet-peeve subjects. I realized the truth of Samuel Johnson’s observation: “To hear complaints is wearisome alike to the wretched and the happy.”

So when I walked into a stylish pizza restaurant this afternoon, I wasn’t going to comment on the TV that was playing behind the bar – I wasn’t going to say anything about how a TV in any restaurant that isn’t a sports bar strikes me as so dreary, so distracting, can’t people turn off the TV for five minutes, blah, blah, blah.

I wasn’t going to complain about it…and then I realized…I kind of liked it.

The TV, turned to CNN, had the sound turned off. No one was turning to look at it, no one seemed distracted from conversation.

And it struck me that the TV provided a bit of color and movement – not as nice as having a view of the ocean, or a real fire burning, of course, but the same type of effect.

Now, not only have I stopped complaining about TV in a restaurant, I’ve become able to appreciate something pleasant about it. That gave me a happiness boost.

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A great site for working mothers to get advice and ideas is Work It, Mom! I was very pleased that they posted my thirteen tips for dealing with a really lousy day.

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Comments

[Niles Gibbs]

I am constantly turning off TVs (my family always has one on at high volume, even when nobody is watching). I'll turn off a TV, and moments later someone will come in, turn it on again, then promptly leave!

As for just muting it, I'm one of those unfortunate people that can hear the buzz of the TV just being on.

There are other ways of adding life to a room besides broadcast garbage.

[Michelle Potter]

I'm not at all a big fan of TVs in restaurants, or TV at all, but I'm happy that you were able to get past an annoyance you can't change, and even find something positive in it. Way to go!

[LoveandSalt]

You know, you just don't come across as a happy person.

[Kashmira]

My pet peeve is that I absolutely cannot stand loud chewing. And there is no way I can think of to actually enjoy it. Any suggestions?

[Beth]

I agree, I don't care for TVs in restaurants. I find that even if they're not on, they tend to mesmerize me.

[Martin]

Wow, life really is beautiful even with the TV turned on or off.. or in a restaurant. Life is especially good when people come together to talk and enjoy good food.

[Gretchen Rubin]

However I come across, I am certainly HAPPIER than I was before I started my Happiness Project! Can't ask for more than that.

[Alex Fayle]

When something irritates me, I think: Can I do anything about it?

If I can, I do it. If I can't, I let it go.

There's no point wasting time on something I can't change.

Cheers,
Alex

PS TVs in restaurants are very bad for me. The movement distracts me and I pay no attention to my fellow diners - even when I don't like what's on the TV.

[Maria Helm]

I think you've hit on the key. If you can stop yourself from making the negative comments, it gives you time to think of the possible positive ones. And you did.

I'm with Kashmira - I don't like loud lip-smacking chewing. It's a peeve that developed with motherhood - I can remember (as a child) my mother telling ME to close my mouth when I chewed. Hmm.. I think I will TRY to just be grateful that my children are health and well fed enough to HAVE that problem. A friend of ours has a chidl who must be fed through a tube, so what am I complaining about? As long as they know not to do it in public!

Now, to find a bright side to people who tailgate...

[adora]

I complain about anything that claims to be "chemical-free". All matters are chemicals!
Om...
I don't think I can learn to like it, but I have stop complaining out loud or pointing it out to the error to sale people. (Being smarty pants is annoying to other ppl.)

[Heidi]

Noises people make while chewing- UGH! Huge pet peeve of mine. Another one is people who won't stop talking, even though clearly the audience they have has mentally moved on. I get so worked up being annoyed with them that even once they stop talking, it takes me a minute to calm down. :) So silly, to get myself worked up over something I have no control over!

[Pili]

I get your articles a day after they're posted. Anyway, I really liked this, but the working mom article: most mom's shouldn't be working. There should be one parent at home.
I actually always thought this kind of thinking was horrible and close-minded, but the older I get, the more true I realize it is. Of course, some familiesm have no choice due to hardship, but it should not be a choice, especially when kids are young. They need someone at home, a mom or dad, but someone who loves them!

[PNWGal]

Earlier this week, I just spent the better part of the drive home from the grocery store explaining what a pet peeve is (mine is non-compact cars in compact spots)to my 4 1/4 year old daughter. After a melt down about cleaning up the living room, my daughter comes out of the bathroom, where she goes when she is upset, and tells me her pet peeve are her eyebrows. She says they get red when she cries or gets mad and she doesn't like it AT ALL!

[Ivana]

I don't have a pet peeve about TVs in restaurants because those are the ones I avoid. They tend to be dark-- the better to see the TV, of course!-- and I like to see what I'm eating. This brings to mind what I frequently complain about which is the food when I've stumbled into the wrong restaurant. It always amazes me that they expect me to pay for their decomposing salad leaves or over-cooked or sour-smelling food or other bad food sins. Imagine adding insult to injury and bringing me a check!! But it happens and too many people don't say a word. I send it back, of course. These days I prefer to eat at home.