What Started Me Thinking

  • "The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer somebody else up." Mark Twain
  • “There is no duty we so much underrate as the duty of being happy.” Robert Louis Stevenson
  • "Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her." Luke 10:41-42
  • “Imaginary evil is romantic and varied; real evil is gloomy, monotonous, barren, boring. Imaginary good is boring; real good is always new, marvelous, intoxicating.” Simone Weil
  • “What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” Colette
  • “It is easy to be heavy: hard to be light.” G. K. Chesterton
  • “A man’s first care should be to avoid the reproaches of his own heart.” Joseph Addison
  • “Best is good. Better is best.” Lisa Grunwald
  • “Order is Heaven’s first law.” Alexander Pope

Happiness Theories I Reject

  • Flaubert: "To be stupid, and selfish, and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness; though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless."
  • Vauvenargues: “There are men who are happy without knowing it.”
  • Eric Hoffer: “The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness.”
  • Sartre: "Hell is other people."
  • Willa Cather: “One cannot divine nor forecast the conditions that will make happiness; one only stumbles upon them…”
  • Alexander Smith: “We are never happy; we can only remember that we were so once.”
  • John Stuart Mill: “Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so.”

How Should I Use Facebook to Help You with YOUR Happiness Project?

HelpI’m working on my Happiness Project, and you could have one, too! Everyone’s project will look different, but it’s the rare person who can’t benefit. Join in -- no need to catch up, just jump in right now. Each Friday’s post will help you think about your own happiness project.

Because of the big boost in happiness I’ve gained from my happiness project, one of my main goals in life is to try to convince other people to do happiness projects of their own. I’ve become a real happiness evangelist (at times, I suspect, a tiresome evangelist), and I’m always trying to think of new ways to coax people into trying various strategies.

People often email me to let me know that they’ve decided to start their own happiness projects; in fact, there are many blogs chronicling people’s progress.

What I do to help other people with their happiness projects? Every Friday, I post a resolution that I’ve tried and found helpful, for other people to consider: Make Your Bed, Don't Perform Random Acts of Kindness, Enter into the Spirit of the Season, Abandon Your Self-Control.

I also email my Resolutions Chart to anyone who wants to see my resolutions for inspiration as they devise their own. (Just email me at grubin “at” symbol gretchenrubin dot com. Sorry about writing it in that roundabout way; I’m trying to thwart spammers. Just write “Resolutions Chart” in the subject line.)

In a month or so, I’m going to do the beta-launch of my fabulous new website of eight happiness-project tools, called (straightforwardly enough), the Happiness Project Toolbox. More on that in future weeks.

But what else could I be doing? Although Friday is usually the day I propose a resolution, today instead I’m following one of my most useful resolutions, to “Ask for help.”

Help me, tell me: how could I do a better job of encouraging other people with their happiness projects? –nudge them to start a project; propose ideas for strategies to try; inspire them to stay motivated; connect like-minded people with each other.

I’m going to post this question from time to time. I’d love to hear any ideas, and at this point, I’d be particularly interested to hear suggestions about how to use Facebook effectively. I have Friends on Facebook, and there’s a Happiness Project Group (that’s how I met my lovely blogland friend Jackie Danicki; she suggested that I sent it up), and there’s a Gretchen Rubin Page.

I don’t have a good sense of how best to harness these tools, however. I love Facebook, but I use it in an extremely basic way.

If you’re a Facebook user, what would be useful for you? What would you like to see happening there?

Feel free to post a comment below, or if you’d prefer, email me directly at grubin “at” symbol gretchenrubin dot com.


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Gretchen RubinGretchen Rubin is the best-selling writer whose book, The Happiness Project, is the account of the year she spent test-driving studies and theories about how to be happier. Here, she shares her insights to help you create your own happiness project.

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