How To Be Happier – in Four Easy Lessons.

I realized that I’ve never done a post about my Four Splendid Truths, although I think about them all the time.

I named these realizations the “Four Splendid Truths” because I was reading a lot about Buddhism when I started to come up with the list.

I get a tremendous kick out of the numbered lists that pop up throughout Buddhism: the Triple Refuge, the Noble Eightfold Path, the Four Noble Truths, the eight auspicious symbols: parasol, golden fish, treasure vase, lotus, conch shell, endless knot, victory banner, and dharma wheel. (After I formulated the First Splendid Truth, I just had to assume that I’d end up with more than one.)

Each one of these truths sounds fairly obvious and straightforward, but each was the product of tremendous thought. Take the Second Splendid Truth – it’s hard to exaggerate the clarity I gained when I managed to identify it. Here they are:

First Splendid Truth
To be happier, you have to think about feeling good, feeling bad, and feeling right, in an atmosphere of growth.

Second Splendid Truth
One of the best ways to make yourself happy is to make other people happy;
One of the best ways to make other people happy is to be happy yourself.

Third Splendid Truth
The days are long, but the years are short. (click the link to see my one-minute movie)

Fourth Splendid Truth
You’re not happy unless you think you’re happy.
corollary: You’re happy if you think you’re happy.
[Many argue the opposite case. John Stuart Mill, for example, wrote, “Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so.” I disagree.]

Now I’m trying to come up with my personal eight auspicious symbols for happiness. Let’s see -- bluebird, ruby slippers, dice, blood, roses…hmmm. I will have to keep thinking about that.

* Ah, I love the blog Zen Habits.

* If you like the blog, you'll love the book! Pre-order The Happiness Project.

Comments

[Positively Present]

I love these four ideas! All of them are great ways to be happier and we'll definitely be talking about these at the DC Happiness Project. :)

[Gayle]

my friend sent me this website on happiness. I love your insights. I clicked on the Years are Short movie. It brought me to tears. This week-end my mother-in-law passed away. My son and I were talking at the funeral about memories from his childhood. He remarked that he would love to take the ride from our old house to his school/my work that we took every day for many years. We had to leave early in the morning and sit through a lot of traffic to get to work and school on time. But we talked and we sang songs on the radio to pass the time. I haven't thought about it for years - but he counts it as a beautiful memory. Lovely.

[Elizabeth]

Perhaps you and John Stuart Mill are trying to say the same thing- have confidence in your happiness.
What do you think?

[supra shoes]

Cool website, like what I have read. Will definitely be back to read again.

[jordan 6 rings]

I must say this is a great article i enjoyed reading it keep the good work.

[Nayan Agarwal]

I enjoyed this post a lot as well as I learned some thing different. Thanks for putting this

[J.D. Meier]

I like your point on the growth mindset. If yo don't have a canvas of growth for your backdrop, your thoughts get distorted against a snapshot in time.

[Adam]

I think you may have misunderstood JS Mill. Seems to me thatyou and Mill agree entirely. His point I think is that when you question the foundations of your happiness then you erode them and, thus, cease to be happy. In other words, when you think you are not happy (or, think maybe you're not happy) then you aren't.

[Suzie]

These really are Splendid. I love the mindset that we create our own happiness and we can choose every day to be happy.
I think I'm happy most of the time :)

[ChrisH]

If irony makes you happy, try this on for size:

Right below my Happiness Project window on my Google homepage is my Quotes of the day window. Top quote today read "Happiness is not achieved by the conscious pursuit of happiness; it is generally the by-product of other activities." - Aldous Huxley

You go, girlfriend.

[Doug Spak]

Thank You for these. I have followed the teachings of Ram Daas for more than 15 years. He tells a story that relates to your post.

He found that after years of meditation, silent retreats, fasting, renunciation, celibacy, etc. he felt no closer to being enlightened. In frustration, he went to his Guru for guidance. His Guru said simply: "Ram Daas, if you want to be enlightened, you need only do two things: help people and feed people."

We search desperately for the keys to happiness when they are often right in front of us.

Best,
Doug

[Richmond Virginia]

I was thinking of looking up some of them newspaper websites, but am glad I came here instead. Although glad is not quite the right word… let me just say I needed this after the incessant chatter in the media, and am grateful to you for articulating something many of us are feeling - even from distant shores. Please come visit my site Richmond Virginia Business Directory when you got time.

[Shreveport Louisiana]

You may have not intended to do so, but I think you have managed to express the state of mind that a lot of people are in. The sense of wanting to help, but not knowing how or where, is something a lot of us are going through. Please come visit my site Shreveport Louisiana Yellow Pages when you got time.

[Sean Smith]

Fabulous! I absolutely LOVED the one minute movie for the third splendid truth.

The second truth, at first glance, seems simple and almost silly. But the depth and profoundness of those two simple concepts are literally life changing in my experience.

Very, very well done. ;-)

[Sam]

You need effort to be happy. When you are able to make yourself happy, people around you will be happy too. Often times, we ourselves have hard times getting happy due to the hectic schedule, stressful life, and a whole lot other factors.

[Benedict]

Hi Gretchen

Just found this via Chris Guillebeau. I really like your approach. Simple and practical.

Tahnks