What Started Me Thinking

  • "The best way to cheer yourself is to try to cheer somebody else up." Mark Twain
  • “There is no duty we so much underrate as the duty of being happy.” Robert Louis Stevenson
  • "Martha, Martha, thou art careful and troubled about many things: But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her." Luke 10:41-42
  • “Imaginary evil is romantic and varied; real evil is gloomy, monotonous, barren, boring. Imaginary good is boring; real good is always new, marvelous, intoxicating.” Simone Weil
  • “What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” Colette
  • “It is easy to be heavy: hard to be light.” G. K. Chesterton
  • “A man’s first care should be to avoid the reproaches of his own heart.” Joseph Addison
  • “Best is good. Better is best.” Lisa Grunwald
  • “Order is Heaven’s first law.” Alexander Pope

Happiness Theories I Reject

  • Flaubert: "To be stupid, and selfish, and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness; though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless."
  • Vauvenargues: “There are men who are happy without knowing it.”
  • Eric Hoffer: “The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness.”
  • Sartre: "Hell is other people."
  • Willa Cather: “One cannot divine nor forecast the conditions that will make happiness; one only stumbles upon them…”
  • Alexander Smith: “We are never happy; we can only remember that we were so once.”
  • John Stuart Mill: “Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so.”

Quiz: What's Your Personality Type -- for Play?

Bouncingballs

Every Wednesday is Tip Day -- or Quiz Day.
This Wednesday: Quiz: What's your personality -- for play?

As I've worked on my happiness project, the importance of play has becoming increasingly apparent to me. For a happy life, it's not enough to have an absence of bad feelings -- we also need sources of good feelings.

For many adults, however, it's surprisingly hard to know how to have more fun. If you don't know what to do for fun, a good question to consider is: What did you do for fun when you were ten years old? Because that's probably something you'd enjoy now, whether walking in the woods, playing with your dog, making things with your hands, taking pictures, playing basketball, or dancing around the living room. When I was ten years old, I spent hours copying my favorite quotations into "blank books" and illustrating the passages with pictures I cut from magazines. Exactly what I do on my blog!

Because of my interest in play, I couldn't resist picking up Stuart Brown's Play: How it Shapes the Brain, Opens the Imagination, and Invigorates the Soul.

I was particularly struck by Brown's analysis of the question, "What is your play personality?" He makes clear that these categories aren't scientifically based, but a product of his years of observation.

Where do you fit in these eight personalities?

1. The Joker -- makes people laugh, plays practical jokes.

2. The Kinesthete -- loves to move, dance, swim, play sports.

3. The Explorer -- goes to new places, meets new people, seeks out new experiences (physically or mentally).

4. The Competitor -- loves all forms of competition, has fun keeping score.

5. The Director -- enjoys planning and executing events and experiences, like throwing parties, organizing outings, and leading.

6. The Collector -- loves the thrill of collecting, whether objects or experiences.

7. The Artist/Creator -- finds joy in making things, fixing things, decorating, working with his or her hands.

8. The Storyteller -- loves to use imagination to create and absorb stories, in novels, movies, plays, performances.

What do you think? Does this accurately capture the different worlds of play?

I found it extremely helpful to see these categories, because it made clear some questions that have long mystified me. How is it possible that some people seem positively to enjoy planning big events? Why don't I enjoy having a collection the way so many people do? Why don't I much like playing cards or board games?

I am #8 through and through, with only a bit of #7. How about you? I wonder if some people have strong appreciation for more than a few categories, or if I'm typical, with a strong inclination for a single category.

Do you see yourself in this scheme? What do you do for play, and where does it fit in here?

* I love every visit to Communicatrix -- great material, thought-provoking and funny. And I can't wait to see the Communicatrix herself at the SXSW Interactive conference this weekend.

* It's true, The Happiness Project is out in paperback! Yes, now you can read the #1 New York Times bestseller in paperback.
Order your copy.
Read sample chapters.
Watch the one-minute book video.
Listen to a sample of the audiobook.


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Gretchen RubinGretchen Rubin is the best-selling writer whose book, The Happiness Project, is the account of the year she spent test-driving studies and theories about how to be happier. Here, she shares her insights to help you create your own happiness project.

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