The Happiness Project

Can You Summarize The Challenge of Happiness In A Single Sentence?

Partly as an intellectual discipline, partly for fun, I often push myself to answer tough, conclusory questions, such as "If you had to pick just one thing, what's the key to happiness?" or "What are the ten most common myths about happiness?"

The other day, I asked myself: If I had to state the central challenge of living a life of happiness, in a single sentence, what would it be? This sentence, I decided, would be a good candidate:

As Flannery O'Connor observed in a letter, "Accepting oneself does not preclude an attempt to become better."

How about you? What's your suggestion for a one-line summary?

* On the BMW Guggenheim Lab, Jon Cotner writes about the Spontaneous Society, a walk he leads through New York City neighborhoods, in which participants try to promote friendly exchanges among strangers. Interesting.

* Want a happiness quotation in your email inbox every morning? Sign up for the Moment of Happiness. Subscribe here or email me at gretchenrubin1@gretchenrubin.com.

"The More Familiar It Is The More Rare and Beautiful It Is."

“Familiarity does not breed contempt. On the contrary the more familiar it is the more rare and beautiful it is. Take the quarter in which one lives, it is lovely, it is a place rare and beautiful and to leave it is awful.”
-- Gertrude Stein, Paris France

* Join the happiness conversation on Facebook and on Twitter (@gretchenrubin).

"Quiet Minds Cannot Be Perplexed Or Frightened."

“Quiet minds cannot be perplexed or frightened, but go on in fortune or misfortune at their own private pace, like a clock during a thunderstorm.”
--Robert Louis Stevenson

I love the simile of a "clock in a thunderstorm." It makes me feel calmer, just to imagine that image.

* Check out the Happiness Project Toolbox: eight free tools to help you track your own happiness project.

11 Brilliant Writing Commandments From Henry Miller.

Cruising around Pinterest (my new toy), I came across this list of Henry Miller's eleven work commandments, posted by Sadie Skeels. I'm astounded by how absolutely apt these commandments are for my own writing practices.

For instance, #10. I struggle with this problem all the time. And #2. I remember a conversation I had with my agent when I was writing Forty Ways to Look at Winston Churchill. I was so enthralled with the material that I couldn't stop researching, and finally she said to me sternly, "No more research." #5 is terrific advice; when I can't seem to write, I can review my notes, edit, cut...and pretty soon I've started writing again. I think about #11 in a different way; I struggle to make sure that writing doesn't crowd out other things that are also important to me.

Henry Miller's Commandments, from Henry Miller on Writing:

1. Work on one thing at a time until finished.
2. Start no more new books, add no more new material to “Black Spring.”
3. Don’t be nervous. Work calmly, joyously, recklessly on whatever is in hand.
4. Work according to Program and not according to mood. Stop at the appointed time!
5. When you can’t create you can work.
6. Cement a little every day, rather than add new fertilizers.
7. Keep human! See people, go places, drink if you feel like it.
8. Don’t be a draught-horse! Work with pleasure only.
9. Discard the Program when you feel like it–but go back to it the next day. Concentrate. Narrow down. Exclude.
10. Forget the books you want to write. Think only of the book you are writing.
11. Write first and always. Painting, music, friends, cinema, all these come afterwards.

These rules seem helpful to non-writers as well; in almost everything we do, it helps to stay focused, refreshed, and perseverant.

What work commandments would you add? And what exactly do you think that Miller meant by #6?

* As I mentioned, I'm really enjoying Pinterest—"an online pinboard where you can organize and share the things you love." If you'd like me to send you an invitation, drop me a request at gretchenrubin1@gretchenrubin.com.

* Looking for an idea for a Valentine's Day gift? Give the gift of happiness! Well, you can't do that, but you can consider giving The Happiness Project (can't resist mentioning: #1 New York Times bestseller).
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"The Longer I Stayed, The Larger It Grew."

Early in his career, artist Alberto Giacometti moved into a Paris studio that measured only about sixteen feet square. He didn't expect this to be a permanent situation, but he stayed for the next thirty-eight years. "The longer I stayed," he said, "the larger it grew."
-- Alberto Giacometti, Giacometti: A Biography

* I enjoy reading Jonah Lehrer's blog, Frontal Cortex. Great stuff.

* Join the discussion on the Facebook Page and on Twitter (@gretchenrubin).

Novelty And Challenge Bring Happiness—Right?

It's very true that novelty and challenge bring happiness. It's also very true that novelty and challenge often bring feelings of anxiety, frustration, anger, boredom, and insecurity. Learning to do new things, or to face new situations, isn't always fun.

It's one of my favorite paradoxes of happiness: Happiness doesn't always make me feel happy.

For the past week, I've been trying to learn to do something new and challenging. I want to make some of my favorite one-sentence aphorisms, Secrets of Adulthood, paradoxes, and the like into nicely designed jpegs. It's harder than I expected! But I've learned a lot.

Here's one of my experiments.

A question for you, readers. My handwriting isn't very attractive; is it a nice, homey touch, or would this kind of image be more pleasing if it had a less DIY look? Be honest.

Of all the things I've written about happiness, I think this line—"The days are long, but the years are short"—and the one-minute video I did with the accompanying story, has resonated most with people.

* If you enjoy reading about the latest research, check out Science Daily. Lots of interesting information, well organized.

* Want a happiness quotation in your email inbox every morning? Sign up for the Moment of Happiness. Subscribe here or email me at gretchenrubin1@gretchenrubin.com.

"To Hear Complaints Is Wearisome Alike To The Wretched And The Happy."

“To hear complaints is wearisome alike to the wretched and the happy.”
-- Samuel Johnson

* A brilliant one-line post from Seth Godin's blog: "Once the water is deep enough that you must swim to stay afloat, does it really matter how deep the pool is?" Very thought-provoking.

* My next book, Happier at Home, is inching its way toward completion. (My part is finished, but now it has to be turned into an actual book.) If you'd like to be notified when the book is available, sign up here or email me at gretchenrubin1@gretchenrubin.com

"Good Order Is The Foundation Of All Good Things."

"Good order is the foundation of all good things."
-- Edmund Burke, Reflections on the Revolution in France

* Especially with my new obsession with color, I love looking around on Gabrielle Blair's blog Design Mom—"where design and motherhood intersect."

* Do you love quotes as much as I do? If so, sign up for the Moment of Happiness, to get a happiness quote by email each morning.

"Each of These Houses Stands In the Centre of the World."

"There are no chains of houses; there are no crowds of men…Each of these houses stands in the centre of the world. There is no single house of all those millions which has not seemed to some one at some time the heart of all things and the end of travel."
-- G. K. Chesterton, Twelve Types

* I was thrilled to read about the two bloggers of Chronically Distracted who are doing their own happiness projects together, and writing about it. I can't wait to hear about their experiences in 2012.

* Want a happiness quote in your email inbox every morning? Sign up for the Moment of Happiness. Subscribe here or email me at gretchenrubin1@gretchenrubin.com.

"Everything Gains In Grandeur Every Day."

“The more I work, the more I see things differently, that is, everything gains in grandeur every day, becomes more and more unknown, more and more beautiful. The closer I come, the grander it is, the more remote it is.”
-- Alberto Giacometti, Giacometti: A Biography

* I think I'm at the beginning of a new obsession, this time with color. Color! Suddenly its influence seems fascinating to me, just the way I abruptly awakened to the power of the sense of smell. The first sign of an obsession, in me, is a desire to read obsessively about a topic. I now have a long library list, and I spent a lot of time on The Morning After the Deluge—"a blog about color, light, and shade in art and science"—and on the Pantone blog. Fun color fact: Pantone has declared Tangerine Tango the 2012 color of the year.

* Do you love quotes as much as I do? Sign up here for the Moment of Happiness, and get a daily happiness quote by email each morning.