The Happiness Project

"The Greatest Of All Human Delusions Is That There Is A Tangible Goal..."

“The greatest of all human delusions is that there is a tangible goal, and not just direction towards an ideal aim. The idea that a goal can be attained perpetually frustrates human beings, who are disappointed at never getting there, never being able to stop.”
-- Stephen Spender, World Within World

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"We Are Never So Much Disposed To Quarrel With Others..."

“We are never so much disposed to quarrel with others as when we are dissatisfied with ourselves.”
-- William Hazlitt, "Characteristics"

This is one of the reasons I started my Happiness Project in the first place. I figured that if I felt happier, I'd behave myself better.

* I enjoy visiting Orangette. It's a very peaceful site.

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7 Happiness Theories I Reject.

Every Wednesday is Tip Day, or List Day.

As audacious as it may seem to contradict venerable figures such as John Stuart Mill, Flaubert, or Sartre, I disagree with some of their views about the nature of happiness.

Flaubert: "To be stupid, and selfish, and to have good health are the three requirements for happiness; though if stupidity is lacking, the others are useless." I argue that this is Happiness Myth No. 1: Happy people are annoying and stupid.

Vauvenargues: “There are men who are happy without knowing it.” Heartily disagree. My Fourth Splendid Truth is "I'm not happy unless I think I'm happy." Or as Eugene Delacroix wrote, "He was like a man owning a piece of ground in which, unknown to himself, a treasure lay buried. You would not call such a man rich, neither would I call happy the man who is so without realizing it."

Eric Hoffer: “The search for happiness is one of the chief sources of unhappiness.”

Sartre: "Hell is other people." [Actually, hell is other people, but heaven is other people, too.]

Willa Cather: “One cannot divine nor forecast the conditions that will make happiness; one only stumbles upon them…”

Alexander Smith: “We are never happy; we can only remember that we were so once.” My Eighth Splendid Truth is "Now is now"; it means many things, but among other things, it reminds to remember the happiness that is here and now.

John Stuart Mill: “Ask yourself whether you are happy, and you cease to be so.” [I reject this statement, but I would agree "Ask yourself whether you are happy on a scale from 1 to 5, and you cease to be so." For me, at least, trying to make those kinds of tricky judgments diminishes happiness—I find it very difficult to answer a question like that—while the simple question, "Am I happy?" contributes to happiness.]

How about you? Do you agree or disagree with these theories?

* I found a lot of great material on Greatist.

* The holidays are coming. For your consideration: The Happiness Project (#1 New York Times bestseller). Buy early and often! Order your copy.
Read sample chapters.

"The Greatest Of All Prizes Are Those Connected With The Home."

"It is impossible to win the great prizes of life without running risks, and the greatest of all prizes are those connected with the home."
—Theodore Roosevelt, Autobiography

* I've been thinking a lot about the nature of "home," because the subject of my next book is—you guessed it, home. If you'd like to be notified when Happier at Home is available, sign up here.

"A Golden Rule That Will Fit Everybody..." (For Home).

“If you want a golden rule that will fit everybody, this is it: Have nothing in your houses that you do not know to be useful, or believe to be beautiful.”
-- William Morris, "The Beauty of Life"

* I'm thrilled to contribute to Quarterly—"a subscription service for wonderful things." If you subscribe to Quarterly, every three months (quarterly), you get a present in the mail chosen from the person to whom you subscribe. So please consider signing up for my curated gifts! You can also give a Quarterly subscription as a gift, tons of fun (and easy).

"It Is Well To Have Some Water In Your Neighborhood..."

“It is well to have some water in your neighborhood, to give buoyancy to and float the earth.”
-- Henry David Thoreau, Walden

* I really enjoyed looking around on Crooked House.

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"Our Way of Living Should Spring from Our Own Deepest Impulses..."

“It is essential to happiness that our way of living should spring from our own deep impulses and not from the accidental tastes and desires of those who happen to be our neighbors, or even our relations.”
-- Bertrand Russell. The Conquest of Happiness

* I enjoyed doing this interview with Lori Deschene at Tiny Buddha -- "simple wisdom for complex lives." The questions were very thought-provoking.

* Do you love Page-a-Day calendars as much as I do? Well, I'm thrilled to report that there's now a Happiness Project Page-a-Day. Fun!

"Failure After Long Perseverance Is Much Grander..."

“Failure after long perseverance is much grander than never to have a striving good enough to be called a failure.”
--George Eliot, Middlemarch

* I'm putting the finishing edits on my next book, Happier at Home. If you'd like to be notified when the book becomes available, sign up here. It's exciting to have a new book coming out.

"Your Duty, Your Reward--Your Destiny--Are Here and Now."

“Do not look back. And do not dream about the future, either. It will neither give you back the past, nor satisfy your other daydreams. Your duty, your reward -- your destiny -- are here and now.”
-- Dag Hammarskjold, Markings

* I was pleased to see that a family friend from Kansas City, Joan Marsh, has put her character-building stories for young readers online as ebooks at Childrens Ebooks By Joan.

* Do you love happiness quotations? I post one here, once a week, and you can also get a happiness quotation in your email inbox every morning. Just sign up for the Moment of Happiness. Subscribe here or email me at gretchenrubin1@gretchenrubin.com.

"Let Us Try To Strew That Path With Flowers."

“Let us choose for ourselves our path in life, and let us try to strew that path with flowers.”
-- Émilie du Châtelet, "Discourse on Happiness," Selected Philosophical and Scientific Writings

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