For the weekly videos, I now tell a story. I’ve realized that for me, and I think for many people, a story is what holds my attention and makes a point most powerfully.

This week’s story: Sometimes flawed can be more perfect than perfection.

 

This also relates to the haunting Japanese concept of wabi-sabi–the beauty of “the imperfect, impermanent, and incomplete.”

Along these lines, I recently watched this Best of Friends Blooper video. I’m a big fan of Friends (so is my older daughter–she’s the one who sent me the link to the vide0) and seeing the actors’ mistakes somehow makes me appreciate the show more. Be forewarned: it’s a little raunchy.

If you want to read more along these lines, check out…

Do you love paradoxes? Embrace happiness paradoxes.

Secret of Adulthood: Succeed by failing.

The things that go wrong often make the best memories–and further Secrets of Adulthood.

How about you? Do you sometimes find that flawed can be more perfect than perfection?

You can check out the archives of videos here. More than 1.3 MILLION views.

Give Gold Stars

Today’s resolution suggests that you “Give gold stars.” If you’re like me, you may think a lot about wanting gold stars, but in a happy relationship, giving gold stars turns out to be very important, too.

If you tried this resolution, did it boost your feelings of gratitude and tenderness?

Did it make a difference to your happiness?

We can all learn from each other, so please post your experiences with the resolution in the comments section below.

Today is Day #1 of the 21 Day Relationship Challenge–but don’t worry, if you sign up after this “official” start day, you’ll get the full 21 days worth of daily emails starting from whenever you sign up.

Here on the blog, in addition to my usual daily posts, I’ll add a very short post about the day’s resolution, to give people a place to weigh in with their thoughts and experiences. We can all learn from each other, so please do comment.  If you have a comment some days later, you can scroll back and add your comment at any time.

You can read all posts related to the 21 Day Relationship Challenge by going here (or searching in the Archives, found in the right rail, in the Category of “21 Day Relationship Challenge”).

Now, why is this a “relationship” challenge? Why not an “energy” challenge, say? (Which would also useful, I think!) Because for many people, I’ve noticed, the element of Happier at Home that resonates most is the discussion of relationships.

Ancient philosophers and contemporary scientists agree that a key to happiness–probably the key to happiness–is strong relationships with other people, so while I didn’t set out to write a “relationship” book, I’m happy to hear that the book is helping people so much in that area.

We all want loving, attentive, and engaged relationships, and warm bonds will do more than anything to make our home a happy place.

Relationships are just one aspect of Happier at Home; it also examines other aspects of “home” such as possessions, time, body, and neighborhood. And it goes deeper into the subject of relationships than we can do in the 21 Day Challenge. But I hope this exercise will be FUN as well as challenging, and helpful.

More love in 2013. That seems like a good way to start the year.

If you want to learn more or sign up for the Challenge, info and sign up is here. You can read a sample Challenge email here. In a nutshell: each day for three weeks I will email you a proposed resolution–nothing too onerous, I promise–for you to think about using in your relationships. They may not all apply to you, but I’ve included a range to cover many different kinds of personal situations.

Onward.  Let me know what you think.

Kiss in the Morning, Kiss at Night

Today’s resolution suggests that you “Kiss in the morning, kiss at night.” If kissing isn’t appropriate in your situation, you might substitute a hug, or make other efforts to show a bit more physical affection than you might otherwise do.

How does this resolution sound to you? If you tried it, did it come naturally, or did it feel forced?

Did it make a difference to your happiness?

We can all learn from each other, so please post your experiences with the resolution in the comments below.

Further Secrets of Adulthood:

 

 

 

One of my Twelve Personal Commandments is to Spend Out–and it’s certainly my most enigmatic Personal Commandment.  I explain what I mean here.  I’d always thought I was the only one who struggled to spend out, to put things into circulation, to use things up, but now that I’ve written about it, I’ve discovered that this is something that many people share.

How about you? Do you have to remind yourself to spend out?

Note about the image: If you can’t tell, the object sitting on the page is a toy Papo treasure chest filled with gold. I bought it as a memento the time I spent writing Happier at Home. If you want to know why, read the Behind-the-Scenes extra.